Huge and Proud
I have only 7 weeks to go before baby number two arrives. I am excited and can’t wait to meet my beautiful baby. I am finding that as the weeks roll on my anxiety increases though which I guess is normal.
I’m not sure what I’d prefer; the naive first pregnancy where you have no idea of what’s to come with birth and coping with a newborn, or consecutive pregnancies where you know exactly what you’re in for!
I am huge. Much bigger than what I was with my first and I am even having another ultrasound next week because I am measuring a few weeks ahead.
I am amazed by how many people – friends, family, strangers – who are incredibly insensitive to my size and my state of being altogether. The comments are coming thick and fast and I fear for the person who finally breaks this camel’s back!
“Gosh, you are huge! You must be having a big baby!” This gets a fake smile from me and a, “Yes, well I hope it’s big and healthy.”
“Oh my, you must be due any day now?!” This gets a, “No actually I have quite a few weeks left.” They have nothing more to say but I can read every bit of horror on their faces.
“You know, you are so big and you are only going to get bigger!” This gets a, “Yes I realise this.” And I mutter something under my breath that no one should hear.
“You must be covered in stretch marks with a belly that size!” I was actually too horrified to even answer this and just walked away from the stranger – yes, a stranger had the nerve to say this!
I also find it amazing how many women who have been through this themselves and still make comments.
So, from this moment on I vow to make only positive comments to pregnant women I know and love (even if they do look huge and exhausted), and to make no comments at all to pregnant strangers – and then, if I really can’t help myself, I will just tell them how glorious they look.
In the meantime, I will continue trying to perfect my snarl – after all, I have my pregnancy hormones to blame if I do finally snap!
March 9th, 2010 at 10:29 am
I was the same. People regularly ask me if I am having twins, or if I am sure there is only one in there to which I give a very terse “Yep” along with an oozingly sarcastic smile, and then change the subject, or say “well, I’d better get going” or sometimes a deliciously over stated “I KNOW!” again with the sarcastic smile that says with my eyes “you idiot”. I think if someone said something to me about my stretch marks, I would flip them off. I think the only safe thing to say to a pregnant women is “wow, you look so beautiful.”
March 10th, 2010 at 6:24 pm
seriously, why is it that when you are pregnant everyone feels they suddenly have a right to talk about your body shape and size… and it’s always “gosh, you’re huge” or “wow, you’re big early” or similar…you know all those kinds of comments that make you feel just dandy (not). i don’t care if im pregnant, i don’t like being called huge! my latest though not entirely creative handling of the situation is something along the lines of “well, there’s a whole person in there” and i found myself explaining to a primary school child why my tummy wasn’t “fat”… i do feel slightly better prepared as to what to expect from people this time around tho (2nd preg) and i agree with Erika, ‘wow you look gorgeous/beautiful/great’ is a winner
March 21st, 2010 at 7:36 pm
Thanks for your comments – I feel quite relieved that I’m not the only pregnant woman being ‘victimised’ – though in saying that I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone.
At my 35 week ultrasound the sonographer was horrified that the baby was already measuring out to weigh 7.5 pounds! Okay, I was a little horrified too (He/she weighs more than Milla did when she was born!). I guess all those comments from friends, family and complete strangers were justified – nevertheless (and like you would both agree) pregnant or not, no one has the right to tell you how huge you look!
Have come up with some great come-backs but I don’t want to be equally horrible so I have perfected that ‘oozingly sarcastic smile’ instead and it seems to have worked a treat